Wandering Toward Promise - Week 8:

 The Season of Pentecost & Summer Sermon Series

These stories aren’t about perfect people. They teach us to trust God even when we cannot see the path ahead.  

Today, we’re going to study a story about plural marriage, wedding night switcheroos, and a family divided by deceit, favoritism, and jealousy. 

I know, right?  This was the original Sister Wives show.  

Seriously, though...  Among the many things that we can learn from these stories in Genesis is that we don't have a corner on the market when it comes to family dysfunction.  It's been going on for a very long time. 

I'm certain that there are a lot of us here today who have our own stories, our own personal pain over broken relationships within our families.  The pain might be fresh or decades long, but we feel it deeply, and maybe we have let it come to define us.  

What I hope we will learn today, though, is that despite our best efforts to mess things up, God has a way of redeeming even the worst family situations.   

GOD’S GRACE SHOWS UP IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR BROKEN RELATIONSHIPS

Genesis 29:15-28

• A bit of background on where this story picks up.  

Jacob has deceived his dying father into thinking he was giving his final blessing to Esau.  Esau threatens to kill Jacob for it, but Rebekkah helps Jacob escape.  He flees to the land of her brother, Laban, who has two daughters: Rachel and Leah. Jacob asks to live there and work for Laban.  

Let's get into the text: 

15 Then Laban said to Jacob, “Because you are my kinsman, should you therefore serve me for nothing? Tell me, what shall your wages be?” 16 Now Laban had two daughters; the name of the elder was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. 17 Leah’s eyes were weak, but Rachel was graceful and beautiful. 18 Jacob loved Rachel, so he said, “I will serve you seven years for your younger daughter Rachel.” 19 Laban said, “It is better that I give her to you than that I should give her to any other man; stay with me.” 20 So Jacob served seven years for Rachel, and they seemed to him but a few days because of his love for her.

• Jacob falls in love with Rachel and commits to working for Laban for 7 years
• The differences between the sisters—Leah is often misunderstood.  

21 Then Jacob said to Laban, “Give me my wife that I may go in to her, for my time is completed.” 22 So Laban gathered together all the people of the place and made a feast. 23 But in the evening he took his daughter Leah and brought her to Jacob, and he went in to her. 24 (Laban gave his maid Zilpah to his daughter Leah to be her maid.) 25 When morning came, it was Leah! And Jacob said to Laban, “What is this you have done to me? Did I not serve with you for Rachel? Why then have you deceived me?” 26 Laban said, “This is not done in our country—giving the younger before the firstborn. 27 Complete the week of this one, and we will give you the other also in return for serving me another seven years.” 28 Jacob did so and completed her week; then Laban gave him his daughter Rachel as a wife.

• On the wedding night, Laban pulls a switch to marry off both his daughters. 
• The tables are turned on Jacob, but he’s determined to marry Rachel.  

This whole situation is messed up from the start, but as you can imagine, it gets worse.  What's not mentioned in this text is that Laban also gives each of his daughters a slave girl as part of the deal.  

• There are some serious issues here with the women in the story.  

They are treated as chattel, and the slaves along with them.  And Leah is in an untenable situation.  

• Leah goes on to have many children, while Rachel cannot.  

If you keep reading, you soon discover that the ability to have children is what is valued in the women in the story.  It's so valued that Rachel gives her slavegirl to Jacob so that she can conceive a child with him.  When Leah seems unable to have more children, she does the same.  So you've now got four women involved in this dysfunction, all drawn into the same messed-up expectations of how women are viewed in this culture. 

• The story is full of brokenness, jealousy, rivalries, abuse, and more. 

So, how do we salvage anything good out of this mess?  Even in ancient Mesopotamia, this was viewed as a recipe for disaster.  

Now, your own family issues may not involve a Sister Wives situation, but it might seem as though it can never be made right.  

God does not wait for perfect families to do holy work.  

Some Questions

• What holy work came out of this family dysfunction?

Out of Leah's children came Levi, who formed the tribe of the Levites, priests and religious leaders.  Zechariah and Elizabeth, the parents of John the Baptist, came from this clan, as did Mary, the mother of Jesus.  

Her son Judah formed the tribe named after him, which would become a clan of kings, and eventually, with the tribe of Benjamin, the only tribes left after the Assyrians destroyed and scattered all the other ten.  

Rachel's son Joseph basically ended up saving the entire family, even after he was sold by his brothers into slavery in Egypt.  Her son Benjamin formed a small tribe that would produce the great king David, and also a lowly carpenter named Joseph, who was the father of Jesus.  

• Where in our own families do we find divisions and dysfunction?

In our current culture, it's become very difficult at holidays and family gatherings when family members disagree over politics.  We have brokenness in our family through betrayal, divorce, addiction, and so much more.  

• How can we reframe our family dynamics with an eye toward grace?

We can begin to see that, despite all of the brokenness, God can redeem and restore.  It may not be something we can see at the moment, but learning to trust that redemption is God's purpose can soften our hearts.  

We can learn to forgive, which doesn't always mean forget.  What may have been done to us is too grievous to forget.  And forgiveness doesn't always mean simply letting someone off the hook.  It does mean that we learn to let them go and entrust them to God, while also letting go of bitterness, anger, and shame.  

GOD’S GRACE SHOWS UP IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR BROKEN RELATIONSHIPS