Presby-Musings

Not that long ago, I was trying to leave the parking lot of a shopping center during rush hour, and get turned around in the right direction for home.  

This meant that I was going to have to navigate my way to a narrow median and then wait for a break in traffic before flooring it to get into the desired lane. Suddenly, I saw my moment--things were going to work out perfectly with the oncoming cars moving just in the right sequence. 

Everything was perfect until one of the drivers decided to make a turn, and the whole sequence fell apart.  

"Aaaaghhh!" I exclaimed.  My wife Merideth sat quietly for a second and then asked, "Did you seriously just get mad at the person for making a turn?"  "Yes!" I exclaimed, "They messed up my whole plan!"  "You're ridiculous," she told me.  I knew she was right, but I didn't admit it.  

Until now, that is.  

I once read a quote from the Roman Emperor and Stoic, Marcus Aurelius that spoke right int…

I believe that the Spirit of God within us creates a longing to connect not just with other people, but with God, who knows us better than we know ourselves.

We long to know and to be known.  We long to truly feel.  To not give in to the despair that comes from the resignation that this is all there is, and there is no Creator or Designer, no plan or purpose.

Because when we resign ourselves to this--even slightly--we end up trying to fulfill our longings with other things, other feelings or even what some might call other "gods."

But when those longings are met for real. We know it.  When we realize (sometimes surprisingly) that there really is a God, and that God is actually connected to us.  It draws out emotions, feelings we didn't know we had.

And when we respond to these emotions we often sing... or pray... or weep... or stand up and dance... or we fall down to our knees or on our faces...

This is called "worship" by some people--a full-on, emotionally-charged…

Yesterday I was feeling a little raw and got vulnerable here in this space about the challenges that my family has been facing this past week.  It wasn't the first time, and I imagine it won't be the last.   

So many of you responded with stories of your own, words of encouragement and offers of help, prayers, and positive vibes.  It meant a lot to me because as a pastor it's not easy to be vulnerable and to admit that things aren't always hunky-dory.  

I am grateful for the grace I receive from you, dear reader.  I can actually feel it sometimes if that makes any sense at all.  It fills me with such gratitude.  

I'm actually preaching on gratitude this month, and so I've been reading and thinking about it for a couple of weeks.  

I'm learning that being able to feel and express gratitude is one of the most vital aspects of experiencing what the ancient Hebrew writers referred to as shalom or the peace of God.  

But I'm also learning that it's not always…

It's been a tough week for me and my family.  I'll spare you the details, but suffice to say... I've been hard-pressed to think of a worse stretch of days, other than the week my mom died.  

I always try to be real on these daily devotions--to be honest and forthright about what I'm thinking.  They are as much for me some days as they are for any of you who might be reading them.  

And I have to say that God and I have been having some tough moments lately.  I was journaling yesterday and the words that formed on the pages of my journal were hard and angry.  I wondered where God was and found myself asking repeatedly, "Will you just show up?"  

Then this morning a passage of Scripture from Luke chapter 5 came into my mind, and I can't think it's a coincidence.  
When he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, “Put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch.” Simon answered, “Master, we’ve worked hard all night and haven’t caught anything. But…