Prayer As Relationship, Not Performance

Today in the Daily Devo, we will begin a Lenten journey through the three main practices of Lent: Prayer, Fasting & Giving.  My hope, as we journey together, is that we will discover new and challenging ways to follow Jesus in his journey to the Cross, and then beyond to the Empty Tomb. 

Lent is a gift to us in that it gives us the opportunity to return home to ourselves, our true selves.  This return is one that we need the presence of God to undertake, and that presence, as we will discover, is always ready to meet us on the road back to who we really are, embrace us, restore us, and walk with us.  

So, let us walk together, you and I, and begin our reflections on how prayer is not merely a Lenten practice but a life-giving practice that leads us down the path toward hope and joy.  

You see, Lent invites us back to the heart of prayer—not as a spiritual obligation, but as a relationship. 

Many of us carry assumptions about prayer shaped by guilt or comparison. We worry about saying the right words, praying often enough, or praying correctly. Over time, prayer can feel like something we perform for God rather than a place where we meet God.

Jesus gently dismantles this anxiety. “When you pray,” he says, “go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret” (Matthew 6:6). Prayer, in Jesus’ vision, is not about impressing God or others. It is about honesty, intimacy, and trust. God is not evaluating our prayers; God is receiving us.

Throughout Scripture, prayer takes many forms—lament, praise, silence, gratitude, confusion, even protest. The psalms remind us that nothing is off-limits in prayer. “Pour out your heart before him,” the psalmist writes, “for God is a refuge for us” (Psalm 62:8). Prayer is less about filtering our emotions and more about bringing our whole selves into God’s presence.

At its core, prayer is not about getting God’s attention. God is already attentive. Prayer is about our attention—learning to notice God’s nearness, to listen as much as we speak, and to remain open to being shaped. Paul encourages believers to “pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17), not by speaking nonstop, but by living with awareness that God is present in every moment.

Lent does not call us to pray harder; it calls us to pray truer. To let go of scripts and expectations. To show up as we are. When prayer becomes relationship rather than performance, it becomes a place of rest rather than pressure.

As this season begins, resist the urge to measure your prayer life. Instead, tend it. Make space. Be honest. Trust that God delights not in polished prayers, but in open hearts that are learning to trust again.

Prayer
Faithful God, draw us into prayer rooted in relationship rather than performance. Teach us to come as we are, trusting your grace meets us fully. Amen.

Reflection Questions

1. How have you understood prayer in the past?

2. What makes prayer feel difficult or intimidating?

3. What might change if prayer became a place of rest?