Prayer that Changes Us

Once when I was small, I was being ornery in a grocery store, and my mom finally had enough.  She fixed me with the steely gaze that only a mom can muster, the kind that pierces you through to your soul, and informed me that I was going to get punished when I got home. 

I decided that this was a good moment to get right with God, so I found a small corner in the bean aisle and began to pray to God to forgive me... out loud.  

My mom overheard my earnest prayer, which included a plea to God that I somehow avoid punishment, and took pity on me, mostly because she couldn't stop laughing.  

So the next time I was "acting a fool," to coin a delightful Southern mom phrase, I tried it again, more dramatically and with no small amount of theatrics.  Unfortunately, it didn't work.  I was left wondering why God seemed to answer some prayers and not others.  

I have come to see prayer in a much different light than that of the little boy in the bean aisle.  Prayer, I've come to understand, is less about getting what I want than it is about becoming who I  need to be.  

Mahatma Gandhi once said: 

“Prayer is not asking. It is a longing of the soul. It is daily admission of one's weakness. It is better in prayer to have a heart without words than words without a heart.” 

His words remind us that prayer is not a transaction but a transformation. It is not primarily about bending God’s will to ours, but about opening ourselves to God’s Spirit so that we may be reshaped from the inside out.

So often we treat prayer like a wish list, pouring out demands or anxieties and waiting for the outcome we desire. But what if the true power of prayer lies not in what changes around us, but in what changes within us? 

Jesus modeled this when He prayed in Gethsemane, “Not my will, but yours be done” (Luke 22:42). His honesty about his anguish was genuine, but his surrender to God’s purposes revealed the deeper work of prayer.

The Apostle Paul echoes this when he tells us, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God” (Philippians 4:6). He continues by promising that “the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:7). 

Notice—the promise is not that our circumstances will be instantly fixed, but that peace will meet us in the midst of them.

When we pray with an open mind and heart, we admit our weakness and allow God to meet us there. The longings of our soul—our unspoken fears, our hidden hopes, our deepest aches—are not ignored by God. They matter. 

And in the act of prayer, even without words, God draws us into alignment with divine love and grace.

Today, let prayer be less about outcomes and more about presence. Seek God not only with words, but with openness. Trust that your soul’s longings are heard. And rest in the peace that only God can give.

Prayer

Gracious God, teach me to pray with honesty and openness. Shape my heart so that my prayers are less about changing the world to fit my desires, and more about drawing closer to Your will. Grant me peace in Your presence and strength in Your love. Amen.

Reflection Questions

1. How have I seen prayer change me, even when my circumstances didn’t change?

2. In what ways can I approach prayer with more openness and less agenda?

3. What longings of my heart do I need to bring honestly before God today?