Letting Go In Order To Let God
My littlest boy stayed home sick from school yesterday. A quick trip to the doctor revealed nothing more than exaggerated allergy symptoms (it's ragweed season here in TX, apparently), and he was cleared of all other ickiness.
But I had to chuckle when the doctor was asking what Jacob's symptoms were, and he was bent on answering all of the questions himself.
Jacob was all about being forthcoming to the doctor regarding all that ailed him. "I got hit in the head by a soccer ball at recess last week," he told her. "And my legs kind of hurt when I came downstairs today."
I'm pretty sure he was hoping for some kind of outcome that involved him staying home from school.
As it turned out, he was in luck, because after all was said and done, it was decided that a day off from school was maybe not what the doctor ordered, but she definitely hinted at it.
All of this got me thinking about how often I bargain with God when it comes to doing what I know to be the right and true thing---what God is leading me to do.
I'll share all of the reasons why whatever it is that God seems to be doing is wrong for me. I'll even describe all the ways that I'm not fit for it, and not up to the task--hoping that the feeling of God's leading will pass.
And sometimes in the short term, I get what I want, but it doesn't come without a struggle, and then the overwhelming feeling that I'm not being the person God created me to be.
I read this great quote from musician/artist/author Michael Gungor the other day. He said this:
Fight it to the degree that you want to suffer. After that, there is surrender.The truth of that statement resonated with me so much. I fight so hard against what I know I ought to do, which only brings suffering and sometimes great pain. But when I surrender and let God lead... when I let go and trust...
I experience so much more of God's great grace and love than I ever could have when I was resisting it with my excuses.
May you experience this same grace and love in abundance as you stop making excuses, tearing yourself down and struggling against God's will, and simply surrender. And may the grace and peace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you now and always. Amen.