This Saturday was one of the hardest days of my life.
We said our final goodbyes to my mom at her funeral as we celebrated her life among family and friends from around the country.
Throughout this grief-filled journey, I have had some fairly raw and honest moments with God.
Most of my raw honesty was due to the fact that on top of everything we were going through with my mom's death, we had a miserably sick kid on antibiotics (and another one who caught it later), a massive plumbing issue at my house, a host of other issues.
And then we got word that my cat ran off, and hadn't been home in two days.
This cat and I have had a checkered and complicated relationship, but we have bonded. I love her aloof, queenly attitude. Even when she escapes and stays out all night, I am usually certain that she'll be there at the door in the morning.
So on the morning of my mother's funeral I was getting dressed, and asking God a raw and honest question, "Seriously? After all I've been through, and you allow my cat to run off and probably get eaten by a coyote? Come on man!"
As we drove to the church later, we got a text of my son's roommate holding the cat. She'd come back--traumatized and freaked out, but back.
I whispered under my breath a short prayer, "Thanks man... thanks. I needed that one."
It was just a cat, but it felt like grace.
I read this quote from Frederick Buechner this morning:
"The grace of God means something like: Here is your life. You might have never been, but you are because the party wouldn't have been complete without you. Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don't be afraid. I am with you. Nothing can ever separate us. It's for you I created the universe. I love you."
May you feel God's grace in a thousand beautiful moments today. May you step fully into that grace, and take it as a gift. And may your being able to take be a gift as well.
And may the grace and peace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you now and always. Amen.